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群居动物|Social Animals

214
Stories
北京
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小时候我是一个很依赖父母的人,尤其是我的母亲。记得七岁那年的五月五,天气异常的闷热,这本不该是一个干燥的西北小镇该有的气象。那天下午我一直在跟胡同里住着的小伙伴们一起调皮捣蛋,抓着蚂蚱吓唬比我小两岁的女孩,追逐打闹,好不高兴。太阳悄悄隐匿,天空中出现斑斓的晚霞,我被奶奶叫回家吃饭。肚子饿的咕咕叫,还没洗手就直接开始剥我最喜欢的粽子,边吃边问妈妈怎么还没回来。得知她瞒着我去太原参加一场同学聚会,翌日才能归家,手里的粽子突然不香了。吃过晚饭后,我把自己关在卫生间生闷气,这么重要的节日都不陪我,越想越委屈,眼泪哗哗流,果然还是小孩子罢。

I was very dependent on my parents as a child, especially my mother. I still remember the Dragon Boat Festival when I was seven years old. The extremely sultry weather was not what we would expect in a small dry town in northwest China. I was outside in the alley playing with some neighborhood children that afternoon and holding the grasshopper to frighten a girl who was two years younger than me. I enjoyed the time of chasing and fighting so much. I was called home by my grandma for dinner when the sky appeared a beautiful sunset. I didn't wash my hands and began to peel my favorite Zongzi directly since my stomach was growling as well as asked my grandma why mom hadn’t come back. The fact I learned that she went to Taiyuan to participate fifteen-year reunion and couldn’t back home until the next day made fall bottom. After dinner, I shut myself in the bathroom to sulk over an hour because I can't accept the situation that she didn't spend the festival with me. 

慢慢地我没有了过节的概念。这样的转变大概是从我离开山西独自去天津学习生活开始的,那一年我15岁。好像一下子长大了,不知道莼鲈之思是什么,很少主动与家人联系。也因为自己少言寡语,不懂世故,曾经的朋友也渐行渐远。客舍宛如村,好事无人载一樽。倏忽十年间的端午,我跟端叔产生过无数共鸣,也一度认为自己有性格缺陷。现在的我知道性格开朗的人在社会上更受欢迎,可我完全接受自己的内向,喜欢自处也不妨碍我去结识志趣相同的朋友,这才叫真正的长大吧。

I lost sight of the concept of any traditional festival gradually. This transition probably began when I headed to Tianjin to study alone at 15 years old. I didn't know what homesickness is and seldom took the initiative to contact my family as if I grew up overnight. I also parted ways with my former friends because I was so reticent and unworldly. I had deep resonances with the poem written by Duanshu, that is, The inn of sojourn is just like the countryside, and no one will drink and talk with you when there is something joyful, and I once thought that I had character flaws. I clearly understand that outgoing people are more popular in society, but I fully accept myself as an introvert. Even if I like the moment of solitude, it doesn't prevent me from making friends with the same interests, which is called real growth.

今天又是端午节。一睁眼打开微信,看着多年未见的老友们更新了动态,心中默念一句“端午安康”。

Today is Dragon Boat Festival again. I see the updates of my old friends who had not seen for many years when I check the wechat upon waking, and send the blessing in my heart.



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